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THE GIFT GUIDE FOR THE MEN IN YOUR LIFE.

Location: FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF MR. WOOD

Miles here. I created the gift guide for men and dudes alike last year, and I’m back at it again. Ask and you shall receive…

Christmas is a magical time in a man’s life when he just might get what he wants without putting forth much more effort than usual. For a change he may be heard by eager ears and unsuspectingly rewarded for his listing efforts. No matter the day of the year everyone deserves to get what they want. Let the gains begin…

O N E. Ebbets Field Flannels. Classic. The t-shirts are a perfect fit and thin enough to last a good while without deteriorating prematurely. Although the tee may be more slim and thin, the logos are respectable for any man’s man.

T W O. Old baseball teams. That’s right ladies, something you know nothing about and won’t care to either. Chances are he doesn’t know the teams either. However, amongst men the “What’s on your shirt?” question, matched with the “Some old Tokyo baseball team.” answer is a win for your gift giving skills being more thoughtful than your female counterpart’s. And those are just the t-shirts! Does he play Wednesday night softball pickup games with his friends? Get him an authentic jersey made in the good ol’ USA. The hats have the best fit (most available with adjustable strap as well) or seal the deal with a jacket. Best purchase though – T-Shirt 5 pack for $99 and/or Hat 3 pack for $99. He didn’t even know he was a fan of the 1961 Kansas City Katz before you came along. Well done, you.

T H R E E. Bose Wireless Headphones. Music is a gift. It can explain your thoughts in ways that you’re essentially too scared to admit to. Music can match, change or enhance your mood and create that check out time needed for you to analyze your thoughts. The best part is that for every song there is at least one person out there that says, “Listen to this part coming up… right here, right here!” And to them, that part right there says everything about what they feel inside or at least want to express. A new set of cans is good, but the best ones make a huge difference. New found layers and sounds will be introduced possibly creating a new thought process for the user. I just got a pair of these Bose Soundsport headphones and they are the shit. Sorry, not sorry. I bump tracks all day and now I am completely out to lunch when I’ve got them on just vibing in places anyone trying to talk to me couldn’t understand unless they had their own pair. Cause I don’t share. When you get them Queen – Bohemian Rhapsody, Kanye – Lost In The World, Lorn – Acid Rain and Kid Cudi – By Design.

F O U R. Malin + Goetz Tobacco Candle. This sums up everything they teach you in a couples therapy class – compromise. You want a candle, he doesn’t. You love the way that one smells, he hates it. This is a candle (win for you) and he likes the smell (win for you). He’s impressed and now he likes candles. Tell no one. It can be your little secret.

F I V E. Chemex Coffee Maker. The house is quiet. He’s jealous that everyone still gets to sleep for another hour but he’s up getting ready to throw down for his team. Unbeknownst to the world, that hour may be the only hour of peace + quiet he will get all day. He’s got to get his mind right before the madness. Help him zen out by hooking up a Chemex. Boil water, grind some beans, pour over. Wet the beans first to allow for oxidation like bubbles popping from a freshly poured soda, then proceed to fill vessel. In between pours he can get in those necessary 100 daily pushups. Bomb coffee, new morning pattern, 6 pack’s back! God damn you’re killing it this year!

S I X. Seriously though, don’t forget the filters

S E V E N. Univ Brand Selvage Denim. Jeans. Good jeans. Wear in shower to wash. Cold water. Hang dry inside out.

E I G H T. At Home Foot Spa. Again, you’ll be so proud. He just complains about the day and just wants be left alone. Put on the headphones, light the candle and dip the dogs. Seriously every man needs to be able to crack his toes and just chill.

N I N E. *Exclusive notation –  if you’re in the area check out Hammer & Nails and lace him an appointment. Bad bitch contest, you in first place!

T E N. IKEA Neck Pillow. There is legit science to the space between your head and your shoulder while you sleep. Essentially you should not have your ear nearly touching your shoulder. This contoured neck pillow will allow for that space to stay naturally straight, much like standing with your shoulder against a wall with your head upright, and in turn will help you sleep better. IKEA is Swedish. Sweden has one of the highest life expectancy rates in the world and is superior when it comes to aging. $15 is cheap for a Christmas present in America. Noted.

E L E V E N. Portuguese Sardines. Dude hell yea. I fuckin’ love you. If I find some classy ass Jew food in my stocking this year everyone’s getting pregnant. This little sixer comes with 2 olive oil, 2 lemon, 1 tomato, and 1 cayenne. A dried out mini baguette and some tabasco and everyone’s gettin’ it. Seriously you win. There’s nothing I can do to top this. Thank you. Honestly, just thank you. You’re the best, I’m the worst.

T W E L V E. ZMAX Auto Lubricant. This is the point where he is questioning all of these gifts. “You don’t know about ZMAX!” But you do… just repeat this.. “It’s the best thing you can do for your car, duh.” They have this video where they put sand where the oil should go and then put ZMAX in and it fires right up. He’ll be skeptical and give you some crazed look but that’s only the look of him figuring out what you already know; that he’s gonna put that ZMAX in his car before he has to go to work tomorrow. Merry Christmas babe…

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